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I love it. It means more than any ring.

[ He tilts his head to look up at Dolph a little. ]

"Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue, and a sixpence in your shoe."

It's a rhyme about a superstition, from one of Erwin's books. It's supposed to mean good luck for newlyweds.

[ huh. ]

I think I've heard of it. Long ago.

I guess you can wear it then. If you want.

[ Jean smiles teasingly. ]

Even if we end up getting married in the middle of summer and I'm sweating my ass off?

[ he flushes. ]

Maybe it can tucked away somewhere.

Like on the bed.

[ ... MAYBE he has an angle here, as he leans up to whisper it into Dolph's ear. ]

[ the flush darkens. ]

It's not a . . . bad idea.

With me in it.

Wearing nothing else.

[ If Dolph still hasn't gotten the hint by then, Jean will be smiling. But he might kiss him just to make it clear, too. ]

[ he hums into the kiss, pleased. ]

I'm sold.

[ He kisses Dolph again, then pulls back a little to nudge him to start moving. ]

They should have installed jetpacks in you.

[ It's a teasing grumble as he starts walking them towards the portal. He doesn't have a place in Stellari, and like hell is he going to take Dolph back to the kitchen to hook up. There's TWO perfectly serviceable living locations in Visium. ]

[ dolph hums. ]

I never used them. It was easier just to jump off buildings.

[ which would probably kill anyone else, but hey. he is a super soldier. still. jean brings up something that had been percolating in dolph's mind. ]

I was thinking of getting a place in Lumindea anyway.

You sound like Levi, saying that.

[ The most direct route is a line, etc. At Dolph's comment, though, Jean tilts his head. ]

For our house? Or for upgrading from the tree house.

[ There's still a lot about the nebulous future home they haven't settled on, other than that they do want it. There's the option of having it on the farmland, or perhaps Dolph has decided he wants the space of Lumindea. ]

[ dolph hesitates. not out of apprehension or uncertainty. after talking to eren, he feels he finally has an idea. no, not an idea.

an understanding. ]

For our house.

[ a beat. and then he shakes his head slowly. ]

For my house.

[ the ownership around that word fizzles like a lit firecracker on his tongue. will jean understand? he's not sure. he just has to keep going. ]

Eren and you — Everyone has their own definition of home. Of what it means. And I realized that . . . I want to find my own definition. I don't want it to be Eren's or yours. It has a place for both of you. For all the people I love.

But I want it to be mine.

[ he lets that settle before replying, ducking his head. ]

I mean. I still want the things we planned. The sunflowers. The bar. All of it. I just — [ he trails off. ] — I want to try this.

Edited 2025-02-08 12:51 (UTC)

[ Dolph so, so rarely asserts ownership over anything that hearing my house makes Jean slow down. He makes sure he's looking at Dolph, listening to him carefully. As he speaks, there's a small smile on his lips, and open affection on his face.

It's a surprise, to be sure. It's not a bad one, and Jean thinks he understands what Dolph needs here. ]

Okay.

[ He smiles, turning to take both of Dolph's hands in his. ]

I mean - you should absolutely have that. Something that's all yours, that you get to figure out what to do with.

Thank you for leaving space for me, but it's yours. I want you to find what home means to you.

Edited 2025-02-09 07:21 (UTC)

[ even though jean has always understood, has always been graceful, has always taken his time with dolph even when it was painful, this moment of acceptance hits him straight in the chest and his breathing stops short. his eye even stings, overcome.

because saying mine and not being shot down . . . when has that ever been true?

his shoulders shake momentarily as dolph bows his head at the weight of it. no, the freedom of it that has stolen his senses. he brings jean's hands up and presses a kiss to his knuckles before pressing them close to his heart. there's more he wants to say but his throat's all choked up. so he can only manage. ]

I'll find it. But you are — You are all my love.

Hey...

[ Jean's smile goes soft and intimate, even though they're still technically in public. He presses his fingertips against Dolph's chest, feeling his heart beat through the shirt he's wearing.

Dolph had to be strong because he had no other choice. For how tall and broad he is, he carries a heavy weight. Jean can only hope that this lets him start to make the load lighter. See the kind of person he already is, kind and loving, trying even when the world has beaten him down.

And Jean will be there when it's too much, to help him. ]

I love you, too. I'll always love you. That's - [ He so rarely says this. He knows what it means. ]

That's a promise. Even when I'm gone, my bones will remember the shape of you.

[ a promise. to be loved. he's loved. somehow, somehow, despite it all, he's found it. the love he wanted for so long. that he was denied so brutally that it felt like a myth. a joke. and he was the punchline, every time.

he's shied away from promises. even though he's gotten better, he's never truly asked for them. he doesn't want to use them as bonds or platitudes. after all, who is more cognizant of choice than dolph laserhawk?

he shakes his head for a moment before tucking it against jean, slipping his arms around him. ]

No.

[ not bones. as romantic as it is. as meaningful as it can be. all he can think is alex, a hole in his chest, that last lingering smile and — no. ]

I rather that . . . even if you forget everything else about me, that you remember the love.

[ I'd rather that you remember the love.

Jean exhales softly, arms coming up to wrap around Dolph in turn. ]

All right.

I'll always remember that I love you, Dolph Laserhawk. You're the choice I make here. And one day, I hope you show me what your idea of home is.

[ dolph shudders against him, his arms wrapped tight. his voice still sounds hoarse and cracked along the seams. he has so much now. he can carry so much in his arms. he never thought he could ever have this much in his life before. ]

Yeah. We'll find it out together.

[ Jean kisses Dolph after a moment, so he doesn't have to keep talking. Anything he wants to tell him now - he's not going to need words to express it.

At least, once they make it through that damn portal. ]

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