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[neighsaying]

INBOX (UN: OMNIDIRECTIONAL) text / audio / video / action This is Jean. Leave a message, and I'll reach back out when I'm available. [ Previously was thunderspear ] code credit

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after getting my face pushed in by an ice twink --

[neighsaying]

I do. When I was younger, I was an asshole for - well, a lot of reasons, but I always spoke what was on my mind. For better or worse.

[ He gives Dolph a reassuring look. ]

I'm a little more diplomatic these days, but I don't like lying.

[laserhawk]

[ dolph relaxes a little. ]

Everyone I knew tried to hurt me. Betray me. It's . . . hard for me to trust anyone.

[neighsaying]

[ It's good to know his read on Dolph wasn't off. ]

You're trying, though. And, hey, I'm not going to get mad if you can't trust me right now. People need time for all different kinds of reasons.

[ He shifts his hands up a bit so that he can brush them through Dolph's hair. ]

[laserhawk]

It's not that I don't want to. I just — [ dolph struggles to get the words out before he gives up, frustrated with himself. ] — I just wonder if it's enough.

[neighsaying]

If it's enough?

[ He repeats Dolph's last words because he doesn't quite understand what he means by them. If trusting someone is not enough? Or if trying to trust them isn't enough. ]

[laserhawk]

[ that may have been too much. he doesn't need to ask if he's enough. he knows he's not. not for alex, not for anyone else. he shakes his head. ]

Nevermind.

Like you said, I'm . . . working on it.

[neighsaying]

[ Jean genuinely doesn't know what Dolph was asking, which is what results in Jean curling his fingers through some hair and tugging on it. ]

Hey - what did you mean? I want to know. So I can help.

[laserhawk]

I just . . . wondered if I was enough.

With all the shit in my life, it just doesn't seem worth it.

[ bitterly. ]

I'm not much of a person.

[neighsaying]

[ Oh, Dolph. It's a little clearer now, and Jean lets go of that hair to cup his face again. ]

I'm not going to try to tell you if you're a person or not. I can tell you that you're enough. You care about whether you are, if you're doing right by people - every monster I've ever met didn't care about that.

Maybe you used to think that, in the past ... like I used to. You don't anymore.

[laserhawk]

[ he's not a monster. he never thought that, though he does hold regrets over the actions of his past. dolph knows he can't be held accountable. he was a weapon. he was property. he was owned.

it helps though, to hear he's enough. maybe he doesn't need to worry. maybe he can just be.

maybe it'll be enough to banish alex's words from his head. I do love you but . . .

instead he leans against jean's touch, pressing their foreheads together. ]

I do like you. Very much.

[neighsaying]

I like you a lot too.

[ Jean rubs his thumbs against Dolph's cheeks. ]

You're enough for me, I promise.

[laserhawk]

[ his cheeks darken. he's enough. he has to hold onto that. ]

You are too.

[neighsaying]

[ Jean grins, a soft look in his eyes. ]

I try my best.

[laserhawk]

Your best is pretty good then.

[ dolph twines his arms around jean, pulling him into a kiss. ]

[neighsaying]

I was top ten in my class.

[ His tone is clearly teasing, and he leans into the kiss easily. ]

[laserhawk]

[ dolph chuckles into the kiss. ]

You should show me what you know, then.

[neighsaying]

The things I want to do to you I didn't learn in any classroom.

[ He lets his voice drop low, for that, turning his head to nip at Dolph's flesh jawline. ]

[laserhawk]

Mm, well, you have free rein.

[ he tilts his head so that jean has easy access as he threads his fingers in jean's hair. ]

[neighsaying]

Hmm.

[ He turns his head a little more to mouth along that jaw, ducking down to leave a faint mark on his neck by sucking on it. ]

What if I said I wanted to finger you until you begged me to fuck you?

[laserhawk]

[ his breath hitches for a moment as his fingers briefly dig into jean's scalp. ]

It is a day for you. . . . Us.

[ the us is tentative. but he said it. ]

sorry about the wait! brain's been potato soup

[neighsaying]

Us.

[ He repeats it with a smile against Dolph's neck, enjoying the press of fingers against his scalp. ]

Does that sound like a good idea to you, then?

no worries <33

[laserhawk]

[ dolph hums, soft and velvet. ]

I quite like it.